The greatest relationship you will ever have is the one with yourself.
If this one is off, the rest of your relationships will also be off.
It is the key to enjoying fulfilling relationships.
Don’t Skimp On or Avoid This One
But often I see people avoiding this one or thinking that the work here is ‘done’ because you can hold a job, think of yourself as a catch, aren’t addicted to anything or don’t allow yourself to be physically abused.
Friends, those things are just the low-hanging fruit.
You can get paid well but not hear your intuition.
You can be not addicted to substances yet still not be fully present.
You can not allow yourself to be physically abused, yet still get sucked into screaming matches.
You can think of yourself as a catch, yet still not allow yourself to receive all of the love offered to you.
These are some important distinctions because these were some of the things that I was thinking and doing in the time before I met my husband.
What Are You Tolerating?
One of the biggest things, if not THE biggest thing that I did was to really examine what I was tolerating in my life that did not line up with what I truly wanted.
I kept choosing men that were not choosing me.
I was tolerating crumbs of love.
I was tolerating a lack of presence in my relationships.
I was tolerating avoidance of the difficult conversations necessary for real growth.
And I was ok with not getting my own needs met (by not even advocating for them or ignoring them).
All of these things I can point to specific examples of in every relationship I had.
Even If I Found A ‘Good One’
And if these things were not present, meaning that I had found someone who wanted to give me the opposite, then truth be told, that relationship didn’t last long.
I would end it because I always found someone who would meet me where I was on my journey.
Anything outside of where I was with my relationship with myself, was at the wrong frequency and therefore could not be sustained.
It was not until I grew in my relationship with myself that I finally came into the same frequency of the kind of high value man that I said I wanted.
But I had to take a hard look at all that I was tolerating up until that point. And I had to make the conscious decision to stop tolerating that stuff.
Just months later, I met that high value man I was looking for.
Your Turn…
If this is resonating with you, ask yourself these two questions:
- What are you tolerating?
- What will no longer tolerate going forward?
The best way to move into the frequency of what you want is to raise your frequency through improving your relationship with yourself.
P.S. If you’ve been wanting to take your relationship with yourself to the next level but just aren’t sure how to do that effectively, I can help. It’s a HUGE part of what we do in Dating Alchemy. The best part is we work 1:1 on the things that are relevant and specific TO YOU. Sometime the things we have been tolerating are rooted in past trauma and old beliefs that can difficult to just stop doing. In our work together we’ll identify those things, poke holes in what you’ve been believing and connect you to your higher self and spirit guides that can help you heal and choose new, supportive beliefs. Self-love makes you MAGNETIC to those around you. Let’s chat about how I can be your guide in this process. All you have to do is follow this link and schedule your time!
